fix: correct user self management on metadata and delete (#10666)

# Which Problems Are Solved

This PR fixes the self-management of users for metadata and own removal
and improves the corresponding permission checks.
While looking into the problems, I also noticed that there's a bug in
the metadata mapping when using `api.metadata.push` in actions v1 and
that re-adding a previously existing key after its removal was not
possible.

# How the Problems Are Solved

- Added a parameter `allowSelfManagement` to checkPermissionOnUser to
not require a permission if a user is changing its own data.
- Updated use of `NewPermissionCheckUserWrite` including prevention of
self-management for metadata.
- Pass permission check to the command side (for metadata functions) to
allow it implicitly for login v1 and actions v1.
- Use of json.Marshal for the metadata mapping (as with
`AppendMetadata`)
- Check the metadata state when comparing the value.

# Additional Changes

- added a variadic `roles` parameter to the `CreateOrgMembership`
integration test helper function to allow defining specific roles.

# Additional Context

- noted internally while testing v4.1.x
- requires backport to v4.x
- closes https://github.com/zitadel/zitadel/issues/10470
- relates to https://github.com/zitadel/zitadel/pull/10426

internal/auth/repository/eventsourcing/eventstore/auth_request.go

@@ -611,9 +611,7 @@ func (repo *AuthRequestRepo) AutoRegisterExternalUser(ctx context.Context, regis
 		return err
 	}
 	if len(metadatas) > 0 {
-		// user context necessary due to permission check in command
-		userCtx := authz.SetCtxData(ctx, authz.CtxData{UserID: request.UserID, OrgID: request.UserOrgID})
-		_, err := repo.Command.BulkSetUserMetadata(userCtx, request.UserID, request.UserOrgID, metadatas...)
+		_, err := repo.Command.BulkSetUserMetadata(ctx, request.UserID, request.UserOrgID, nil, metadatas...)
 		if err != nil {
 			return err
 		}